Please note that some items may not be in stock, as no one has ordered anything since 1991. Please try to contact us first to make sure we can find your item and that is in stock.
BRAIN DAMAGE SHOES
ITEM: BD00001 Step out in style!!! These shoes are made from high quality plastic and look exactly like real leather !! One size fit nobody; these plastic shoes are made for all sizes and can be pulled over any size feet. Each shoe has an embossed likeness of Roy and Scott and can be cleaned with soap and water. Shoes can be switched from left to right; this revolutionary new design means that either shoe can fit onto either foot. Air holes in the top allow for circulation on those long walks in the summer. Great comfort as well as fashion! Available in black, brown or one of each colour. Each shoe: $29.95 x 2 + H.S.T. = $ 81.17 Warning: Not to be worn outside |
BRAIN DAMAGE T-SHIRTS
ITEM: BD00002 Buy one for someone you love; or someone you hate! Just buy one. These high quality t-shirt, with cotton-polyester blend are the perfect fashion accessory for lounging around the house, working out, or just being a fan. Pick from several funny attractive designs that say 'I want Brain Damage!' Each Brain Damage CD is featured on a shirt; each shirt comes with a description of the CD on the back, and an autographed photo of Brain Damage. Order yours today. $43.52 ea. Note: Design may come off in the wash. |
BRAIN DAMAGE UNDERWEAR
ITEM: BD00003 These 100% polyester boxers are just the thing for the hard to buy for fan! Adorned with beautiful photos of Scott and Roy, these boxers are available in three sizes: small, medium and "We Can Take You Fat" size. Made from 100 % polyester, these boxers expand as the wearer expands, and yes, they can be washed. Don't be caught with your pants down! Get your boxers today. Also available at Canadian Tire in the automotive department. A bargain at only $42.87 per set |
BRAIN DAMAGE LUNCHBOX
ITEM: BD00004 Want to lose your lunch? Well you won't with this wonderful bucket that lets you have lunch with Brain Damage. Comes with an attractive Brain Damage design (subject to change without notice) and includes handy carrying handle, with lock and key. Includes thermos. Special Price: $72.59 Caution: Avoid direct contact with food. Paint is lead based with an arsenic protective coating which prevents corrosion and rust of lunch box. Avoid direct sunlight as heated lead/arsenic can explode. |
BRAIN DAMAGE TRADING CARDS
ITEM: BD00005 Collect them, trade them, or just eat the gum and throw away the cards. Each pack comes with 5 cards and one piece of bubblegum. The back of the cards piece together to form a poster size picture of Brain Damage. Collect all 44 cards. Sold only in boxes containing 25 packs. Don't count of having all the cards you need to complete your set in one box. May take 3 or 4 boxes to complete a set. $225.00 per box |
BRAIN DAMAGE BOBBLEHEADS
ITEM: BD00006 They're back! By popular demand we're proud to announce the return of the Brain Damage Bobblehead dolls! Brain Damage has entertained us for years on TV in "M.V. Film Presents", on CD and on the big screen in "Child Of The Night". Now they can nod and bob on your dashboard as you drive to work. $24.99 each Warning: Heads my fall off. |
FINE ART
ITEM: BD00007 This oil (lead) painting will brighten a rec room, or wreck a bedroom! The artist painted this picture from a photo taken during the recording sessions of "The Evil Jed Excel"; back in 1982. The photograph later became the cover of the "Hot As Jed" album. This historic painting shows Jed, seated at Scott's Wurlitzer, with Scott in the control booth. Roy is standing behind Scott, but is not seen in the picture. Please note that the Albo Nude fine art is no longer available due to the shortage of flesh colour paint. $4,898.95 PLUS Postage and Handling Note: Paint may fall off once paint is dried |
BRAIN DAMAGE PAINT BY NUMBERS SET
ITEM: BD00008 Feel like painting the Sistine Chapel? This is the next best thing. The official paint-by-numbers Brain Damage fun kit. Pick this up for the artist on your gift list. Give life to that famous photo taken at Rooster's Cafe in Carleton University. Kit comes with picture, an array of colorful paints and two paint bushes. ON SALE NOW: $52.99 Note: Some paints do not coincide with numbers on photo. Also in some cases, duplicate paint numbers maybe be on two or more paint colours. Use in a well ventilated space. Paints contain lead and several oil based liquids that are flammable, as well as corrosive to the touch. Not responsible for mishaps. Check for local poison control number in your area if swallowed. |
BRAIN DAMAGE PUZZLE (300 pieces)
ITEM: BD00009 From a photo taken in 1982 at "George's Cantina":, in the Ritchie Street district of Ottawa, this jigsaw puzzle will keep you spellbound and frustrated for hours; some pieces are missing, and some pieces are duplicate; a sure hit with those that love a challenge! $31.47 |
JED EXCEL TURNED 40 T-SHIRT
ITEM: BD00010 This t-shirt comes with 104 letters that you can change the name, plus 20 numbers, but your stuck with the face of Jed on the shirt. The perfect gift for that special someone who thinks they have it all. Give the gift no one wants. $35.00 Warning: Letters fall off very easily. |
ROY COSTUME
ITEM: BD00012 Want to get kicked out of bars when you walk in? Try this on for size! The Roy costume!! Comes with life-like hair (not much), 2 shirts; one red, a mask with attached black, a gay 'Village People' hat that inspired the line..."do you have any fruit with you?" and a fake guitar that can never be tuned. Certainly better looking than the original. $3.95 |
ALBO COSTUME
ITEM: BD00013 The Albo costume is a custom designed ensemble that takes it's cue from Las Vegas. Tell them you just got back from L.A., Hollywood, or New York City. They'll know you're lying, but you must be delusional; you're visiting this site so you must be! You can inflate this costume to be any size of Albo that you want. The expandable waist can reach a whopping 64 inches in diameter. The costume is made from coagulated paint and it looks remarkably like silk. Comes with one microphone and a cutout likeness mask of Albo. Built for years of use, it comes with a 3 month guarantee. $729.31 Caution: Must be used in a well ventilated space. Keep out of reach of children |
BRAIN DAMAGE FORMAL WEAR
ITEM: BD00014 These attractive polyester suits are replicas of those worn for by Roy and Scott, in that 1982 comedy classic M.V. Film "The Day Roy and Susan Got Married". This "retrofit" design will make you look in style, hip, and cool...if it was 1982. These suits simply are pulled over the head. No pesky buttons, or zippers. It comes as a one piece body suit !! Can be worn for formal occasions such as weddings and funerals. Comes in two different styles, regular or tuxedo. Rentals available. Available in small and extra large. Rental: $46.12 an hour Buy: $39.95 NOTE: Does not come with dress shoes. See catalogue item BD00001 |
JEDMOBILE
ITEM: BD00015 "Remember we laughed, 'cause his car was his home"? Well guess what? You can have his car, but don't try to live in it! Yep, Jed's car comes with 99 plastic flies, smoke tablets and a bobblehead of Jed's noggin right on the front bumper!! This car has been immortalized in several Brain Damage songs and now you can give it to a young one, someone who's young at heart, or yourself. This realistic design has flat wheels and doors that fall off on their own, just like the real car. Sure to be a collector's item. Available for a limited time only, so buy two!! $225.95 |
ALBO WIG
ITEM: BD00016 Remember G.I. Joe with “life like hair”? Well now we have the same thing for adults. Modeled after the hair style of Albert Cardarelli, this wig looks fake and feels fake. There are two different wigs to choose from: the “Forever 16” look, as shown here, and the deluxe “Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow” which allows the owner to experience the feeling of losing their hair (full loss of hair within the first two years of wearing the wig). Forever 16: $29.99 Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow: $159.99 NOTE: Prolong use of wearing these wigs is known to kill any real hair that you have. Never wear outside if temperatures are above 25 degrees Celsius as the wigs will adhere to your scalp |
WE CAN TAKE YOU FAT BIB
ITEM: BD00017 If you eat like Scott, you'll need this bib. With velcro fasteners to accommodate different sizes of necks, this one-of-a-kind bib can be used by a messy kid or adult. Taken from the hit, "If We Can Take You Fat", the bib features an attractive likeness of Albo on the front. This bib is made from high quality plastic and can be easily cleaned with a damp cloth. Also available at other fine stores. $ 24.95 |
WOMEN'S PAJAMAS
ITEM: BD00018 Ever want to sleep with Brain Damage? Well, here's your chance! Introducing our designer label intimate apparel collection, featuring this luxurious pajama ensemble, made especially for Brain Damage, from the makers of Silly Putty. Made from plastic, wax, and lycra fibers. Snuggle up with a Brain damage video, Brain Damage CD, or with someone with brain damage. Attractive likenesses of Scott and Roy adorne the inside and outside of this garment. A must for that "someone special"who would like to wake up with Brain Damage. Caution: may liquefy under certain circumstances. $75.99 |
ALBO DOLL
ITEM: BD00019 Fully poseable with authentic stage outfit, this item is a must for your collection. Stands 12 inches tall and comes with lifelike hair. On the back is a pull string to hear Albo sing one of three songs. You can play for hours with this doll and never get tired. Pretend Albo is singing at Ken and Barbie's wedding or getting a pounding by a gang of G.I. Joes. The possibilities are endless. $25.00 |
BRAIN DAMAGE CHEWABLE VITAMINS
ITEM: BD00020 On sale now! (Expired over 20 years) Brain Damage vitamins! These tasty, high potency multi-vitamins come in likenesses of Roy, Scott, Albo, and Bucky and are made with delicious artificial flavours: celery, root beer, chocolate, and beef. A one-a-day dosage will increase energy, maintain health, and prevent illness. One tablet taken daily exceeds the following nutrients as set out by Canada's Food Guide. Get on the road to good health with Brain Damage Vitamins! $54.95 Caution: Not to be taken by children, during pregnancy, while breastfeeding or by those on prescription medication,unless under the recommendation of a health care practitioner. Prolonged use can cause renal failure, toxic shock, neurological disfunctionm, or cardiovascular impairement. |
BRAIN DAMAGE FANNY PACK
ITEM: BD00020 Exclusive to Brain Damage fans!! Now available for a limited time, vintage retro look, 1980's Brain Damage Fanny Pack! These attractive colorful fanny packs are worn on the waist area and are perfect for storing lunch, keys, credit cards, pens, glasses and other "lifes" essentials. As an added bonus, the plastic carrying pouch can accommodate antiseptic wipes, k-y jelly, sterile gloves, underpads, diapers or briefs, for those needing catheters. For our diabetic fans, there is a velcro pouch that can accommodate an insulin pump and glucose meter, and of course, there is a water tight compartment that can hold your MP3 player, on which you can listen to your Brain Damage songs! Cleaning is easy: bodily fluids (fecal matter, bile, blood) can be removed with a damp cloth. Get yours today! Buy: $ 19.95 NOTE: May come unattached often. Brain Damage and Brain Damage Enterprises are not responsible for lost items. |
THE ALBO LYRIC BOOK
ITEM: BD00021 Did you ever want to sing along with Brain Damage, but didn't know the words. For a limited time only we are offering copies of Albert's Lyric Book. Inside is the lyrics to each and every Brain Damage song, along with cover songs made popular by Royal Albert and The Collection. Each verse and chorus may or may not have the correct lyrics and some might only contain "La La La", but don't let that stop you from singing along. Regular Book $24.95 In the deluxe version, you will receive a leather bound copy of this book, that also includes a detailed illustration of each songs interpretive dance steps, as performed by Albert himself. As an extra bonus, you will also receive at no extra cost, an Albo Costume (see item BD00013) Deluxe Book $2,568.03 |